Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
