she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
i would one night stand the shit outta him
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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