are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
