im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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