worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
