idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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