the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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