i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I am naked and annoyed.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
