Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize