can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
You are the jesus of drinking
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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