Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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