We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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