and you said cock pushups were impossible
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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