Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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