I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
