we have pet lesbian snakes
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
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