We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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