Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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