wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize
