We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize