Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
