I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
