ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
