Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I'm always down for nudity.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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