so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize