Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
