She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
