I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
