It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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