I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I'm too high and old for this...
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
