But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
