theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
