who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Randomize
