Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
