Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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