so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
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