Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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