it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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