I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
