I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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