Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
