ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize