She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
