He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
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