What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
