No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
