wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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