is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
