it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
