I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
