I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
