Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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